So you want to know a little more about the woman with a black belt in mixed martial arts and crafts. Welcome! This is my little corner of the internet devoted to helping you live your Best. Life. Ever! I try to do this by writing with humor and sarcasm about all the things I love and all the methods tackling life that have helped me. I am probably also plotting how to take over the world (current go-to method: cheerful awkwardness).
Wait, you'd like to know more? That's very brave of you. Grab a strong drink and buckle up because this is going to be a bumpy ride.
This is me:
And every single day, I look like that. In my mind, at any rate. Yes, I charge into anything and everything with the blind belief that I can do it. And now with a blog, I'm making sure that you can, too!
I'm originally from Louisiana, but, thanks to watching lots of old movies, my speech doesn't give many verbal clues aside from the abundant use of "y'all." Fun fact: in one two minute voice message to a friend, I managed to say "y'all" 47 times. That's a "y'all" approximately every 2.5 seconds. I'm a fast talker, though, so there were a lot of words between each one.
I packed up and moved my wee family to Arizona in 2007 for a job in theatre (one of my lifelong passions) and learned a lot but regretted little. Ok, I did have regrets that one time when there was a scorpion the size of a Cadillac Escalade hanging out of the vent above the bathtub. And when I realized certain important realities like my coffee isn't available in stores and I would have to buy it off the internet like it's truffle oil or sexy time products. Or that the only way to assuage my shrimp po-boy craving would be to make the thing myself. But really those moments were few and far between.
But at some point, I grew restless. And that's how in 2018 we ended up in Minnesota. In December. When I'd never seen snow before. I now understand sidewalk salt, the versatility of tater tots, and how to say "Holy Cow" unironically.
When I'm not working, crafting, or cooking, I like to indulge in hobbies such as:
- reading
- trying to save all the animals and adopt all the strays
- learning new languages
- watching movies and TV shows
- soothing the inner magpie that demands shiny things (I'm thinking about naming him Merlin)
- creating a home that is fit for company
- pretending I'm very normal. This requires a ton of effort and usually starts going downhill the moment I open my mouth.
My crafts run a wide gamut of interests which has led to a craft stash that should be embarrassing, but I don't generally understand shame when it comes to something that glorious. The yarn, the embroidery floss, the material, the beads, the stamps: it's all a treasure chest of inspiration. Do you think my patron saint Martha Stewart feels shame when she looks at her craft supplies? Hell no! The exact opposite: she goes and makes more!
I am no less hoardy (shut up, spell check. It's a word. I just said it.) when it comes to cooking. I have a soft spot for cooking implements and recipes of all kinds and I'll happily putter an entire day away in the kitchen whipping up more food than I probably should. Maybe this is why I start getting nervous when I have less than two pounds of butter in the fridge. And when it comes to cooking, Nigella Lawson is my spirit animal. I strive to be that confident, assured, and sexy while I'm cooking.
My style is eclectic on all fronts, from clothes to home décor. Today I may only want a vintage vibe. Tomorrow I can see modern minimalism and drool over its gloriousness for my house, but watch out, because the day after will find me coveting Victorian opulence in furniture and longing for their manners. Still, when it comes to a day-to-day aspiration of how I want to look (key word there is want), look no further than Dita von Teese. I'm sure if I could summon a patronus, it would end up being her. And with a wave of red lipstick and a solid dose of hairspray, evil would be conquered and a martini would be consumed.
I run on coffee. I drink my coffee with chicory and without cream or sugar because I like my coffee like I like my men: strong and a little bitter. Other things that keep me going: chocolate, optimism hidden under sarcasm, hilarious imaginary scenarios (see: patronus, above), fantastic music from all the genres, and an unrelenting drive to do all the things. Seriously. One time I had a whole mini nervous breakdown because I started to think of all the cakes I wouldn't have baked if I died right then.
Still with me? My, you are made of strong stuff! Well, the best way to get to know me is still by reading the blog. What are you waiting for? There's a world of wonder up there!